Be kind, love others and always count your blessings

Dear Spencer,

Of all the things I've written you letters about, I've never touched on anything of any real importance.

Sure, I've told you the story of how I married your father, stories about our long-lost loved ones, and lessons on worrying. However, somehow I have managed to graze over the important stuff. The life lessons. The things that I know will shape you into a better man.

Truth is, I started this blog as a way to document our journey together while you were living inside me and the first year of your life. I wrote it all down so I wouldn't forget a thing about you. But notably, I've also written it so that you wouldn't forget about me either.

One of my biggest fears in life is that Daddy and I won't be around to teach you right from wrong. Sure, other people are capable of teaching you the easy stuff like thou shall not kill, or steal, or cheat or lie - - but you're smart enough to already know those things.

What we want you to know is kindness. And love. And empathy. And humility.

Because those are the important things.

In a world where people are quick to form judgments, I want you to be the sounding voice of reason. Be the defender. Stand up for what you believe to be right. It's easy to follow the crowd, to be quiet, to turn the other cheek, to tolerate injustices.

It takes a real man to look in the face of wrong and make it right.

Living in small-town America, I see injustices daily. People make racist and bigoted comments around here so often that they don't even realize they do it. It just rolls off the tongue.  They are quick to pass judgment on others without even knowing more than a page of their story.

Spencer, I want you to know that your daddy and I do not support or stand for these injustices. We believe that everyone is entitled to living their lives without the scrutiny of our harsh judgments. We believe in love. In sacrifice. In patience. In kindness. In counting our blessings. We believe in helping others and paying it forward. We believe that all races, all nationalities, all people of all religions, all genders no matter what their sexual orientation may be -- are deserving of love. We believe in equal human rights. We believe in sympathy and empathy and that good is born from good. We believe that an eye for an eye leaves the world blind. And we believe that you can never be too kind or too understanding or too forgiving.

We encourage you to be yourself, whoever you may be. We want you to follow your dreams, love the person who makes you happy, and know that no matter what, we will always, always love you. We will always accept you - - because you are perfectly beautiful just the way you are.

The American writer, Oliver Herford once said "A man is known by the silence he keeps." Don't be known for your silence. When you see something unsettling, say something. Stand up for what you believe to be right. Be who you are, and be proud of that person. It may be difficult at first, but I promise in the end it will make you happy and garner you respect with the people who matter the most.


Forever in love,
Mommy